I don’t want to be called a “Christian”

I don’t want to be called a “Christian.” I feel like people use that so loosely. They throw it around like a lot of words that have so much meaning behind them, like the words,”love” and “hate.”  I know a lot of people in my life who want nothing to do with God because of how other people have portrayed God out to be. That affects their life eternally. Being a follower of God changes how you see everything in life. By no means do you live a perfect life but it changes you from the inside out. I pray that God shows me how he sees his people. I pray he teaches me how to love like he does. I pray he that he helps me serve the people who have hurt me and changes my heart. I want to show the world his kindness through my life. I’m reading this book right now and it talks about how God sees us naked- he sees all of our sins, and us for who are. He hears all of our thoughts and he knows what’s on our heart- all the ugly parts and he still loves us anyway. It says,” if we were together right now, I’d turn to you, with tears of true understanding, and whisper, ‘who told you you were naked? Who told you that you are anything less than a most glorious creation of the Almighty God? ‘Who spoke words over you and about you that stripped you bare and broke your heart?’” You see Adam and Eve didn’t know they were naked until they were deceived by the devil. And the devil will speak lies over you and make you believe and things about yourself that aren’t true. And the book talks about how you think these negative thoughts about yourself, and people who are also broken, will speak those things to you and you believe them. And some of these people are people who claim to be Christians. I know in my life I’ve been one of those people and I will continue to mess up. I pray that God works on me and that he helps me be more careful with my words and actions. I pray that to those I’ve hurt and didn’t show Jesus that they forgive me . People who follow Jesus are just as broken as people who don’t. But the difference is that Jesus gives us hope. I pray that I’m able to give others the same tenderness that he’s shown me. To help others see the difference. I want to be a light in this world for him. I don’t believe that I was put on this earth for me but for others. Even though that I’m in school to pursue my dream to be a dental hygienist, that is not the calling on my life. My calling is to love others and show them God’s love. We live in a cruel, sin-filled world. Full of hatred in all forms. We’re called to be different. We’re called to stand out and remind this world of Jesus. Even if I have everything I want but I don’t have Jesus, I have nothing. I don’t want to be just someone that says I’m a Christian. I want to be a true follower. 

Update

It’s crazy to me that I used to write all the time and I look back at the last time I wrote, and it was 2016. So much has happened in the last couple years and I continually find myself searching different blogs to express how I’ve felt and I finally decided to just write it myself. I’m at the strangest place in my life right now and I find myself so overwhelmed with where I want to be and who I want to be. But I get so caught up in that, that Im worried about who I want to be and I don’t realize that I’m missing the whole picture, I’m supposed to be who God wants me to be. I’m not here for me. The only reason I’m here is for God. God is slowly but surely showing me in the midst of this that life throws at me, it’s beautiful chaos because through it all I’m having no choice but to trust solely on God alone. Im growing as a person because I’m becoming very aware and mindful of my actions, and how my actions affect others. The past 2 years I’ve not been who I wanted to be and I’ve made a lot of choices I’m not proud of. I’ve hurt people in the process I wish I could take back, but I’ve learned through it all. I firmly believe sometimes you have to learn the hard way. And by hard way I mean falling smack dab on your face. It’s not necessarily a bad thing because I’ve grown from it. I guess that’s my whole reason in all this is that life is all about growing. We can choose to be better or bitter. Everything in life that happens, good and bad, God is molding us into who you and I are supposed to be. And through everything, we’re learning. You can’t grow if you’re still stuck on yesterday and there’s no room to grow if you’re still harboring bad feelings when you need to forgive and let go. Life is a constant adventure and there’s no need to take a rest stop and stay there or else you ain’t gonna get to where God wants you to go- you’ll just stay at the public bathroom with stale vending machine snacks. (Lolol) I think my big problem is I get nervous over on uncertainty and I’m constantly worrying if I made the right decision, and that’s not ever true because you’re where you are at this point in life because there’s a reason you’re there. - to be blessed or for you to be a blessing to someone else. I have faith I’ll get there where God wants me to be, and through the uncertainty, chaos, and everything else that is thrown at me-  I choose joy. 

Surrounded by believers

It's so important to have people who love Jesus surrounding you. It's so easy to drift away from God when you're not around people who crave him. What do you mean? I'm saying when you don't surround yourself with people who crave Jesus, it's easy to drift away from God. I've found myself in that situation. You become who you hang around. When you spend time with people you'll find yourself picking up some of their habits or some things they say. If you think about it, we've all done it or seen someone else do it. If you're not careful people can become distractions with your walk with Christ. Instead of going to church, you'll cancel and do something else because you just don't "feel like it" anymore when you used to love going. You lose interest. When you don't have people around you to encourage you to invest your time with Jesus, it's easy to drift away. By no means am I saying don't hangout with people who don't love Jesus! Always witness when the opportunity is granted! And you can be that person for someone else, just make sure you have that person for you as well.

I've been really struggling with my walk with  God lately, but thank God he picked me up! It's because of my accountability partners and my family of believers that redirected me when I had gone astray. I'm so incredibly thankful I have those people in my life. God is so good, when we aren't. He blesses us in so many ways. 

Real Christianity

This could never be said enough. When you're a true follower of Jesus, you love everyone because Jesus loves everyone. You don't always agree with every decision, but you love the person. That's the whole point in hate the sin, and love the sinner. And just incase anyone needs the reminder, we're all sinners. "For all has sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23. Not trying to step on any toes, but just because you haven't done anything terrible doesn't mean you haven't sinned. All sins are the same in the eyes of God, so be compassionate for others. The only one that should be judging us is the one who got us here in the first place. Granted, we judge unconsciously. Just because you think it don't mean you have to say it out loud. I pray that God gives me eyes that see people the way he does, and believe me when I say that he answers prayers.

Lost Opportunities

I've been doing a lot of thinking about this, so I decided to write about it. It's a shame that we're SO worried about the actions of what other people would do, so we refrain to act on something. What am I talking about? People hesitate to give money to the homeless because they think they will immediately will go buy drugs or alcohol. People don't give rides to people who are walking on the side of the rode because they're afraid that they would hurt them. Allow me to say that yes SOME people will do that, BUT not all people are bad. I could walk into a store and at the same time of me minding my own business, someone could come up and hurt me. Regardless of the situation, people will make their own choices. You can't do anything to prevent the actions of others, but you are responsible for your actions. One of my favorite quotes is by Anne Frank who was a victim of the holocaust. She wrote, "Inspite of everything, I still believe people are really good at heart." Take that how you may, but to me someone that lived through the Holocaust and was able to say that...that speaks volumes. I understand that there are bad people in the world that will take advantage of people's kindness. Not all people are bad though. Not all people will take advantage. I believe whole heartedly that there are some people out there need help. And a lot of the people on the street statistically are our veterans. This whole point in me writing this is to say don't stop being kind or doing things for others because you have the fear that something bad will happen. This world is continuing to get worse, and I understand that. You have to be careful and take precaution and use good judgement.  But If God leads you to do something, do it. Don't miss out on an opportunity, God will protect you. I mean what if that was you on the street? You'd want someone to help you.  Have we really lost so much hope in humanity to not show an act of kindness? I'm not saying go pick up the next person you see on the road, but if you feel led to do it, by all means do it. That is a opportunity to witness to someone, and who knows you might be blessed too. The greatest blessings someone will ever get is by doing something for someone else. 

"Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people..." Galatians 6:10 

My God will come through, always.

This passage in the picture has been on my mind all night. This woman literally gave all she had to survive, and she gave it away. For me, that would have been extremely difficult especially if it was all I had to get me through to the next day. What made her able to do that though, was through faith. She had faith that God would provide for her. In difficult times, we start to wonder how we're going to just make it to tomorrow. In those times, look to the one who created you and knitted you in the womb. If you're like me and you're a worry wart, I got the perfect scripture for you. He tells us in Matthew 6:34,"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." I have this taped on my bed, because I need the constant reminder that God will take care of everything that I feel is something to worry about. Tonight at church I felt God remind me how blessed I am, and I heard him tell me things that I need to change. The offering came around him and this passage in the picture popped up in my head. I put all of the cash on me I had in the offering.  I was thinking to myself, "but God what if I need it?" Then I thought of this woman who gave everything. I often forget to realize the "stories" in the Bible aren't just stories. They're real events that happened. She had faith that God would provide. And I know that He did. The pastor said something that I will never forget as I was having second thoughts,"if it's hard to give when you have little, it's going to be even harder to give when you have a lot." I know that some struggle, but whatever you feel like God tells you to, don't second guess it. He will always provide when He has asked you to do something. He won't leave you hanging.

Have faith. 

White As Snow

If you're reading this, I need you to know that I do not expect everyone to agree with me on this topic. We were all made very differently as individuals, saying that we all have different beliefs and perspectives. If you have anything negative to say, please keep it to yourself. As I said before I understand that not everyone will agree,and I respect that. I don't expect everyone to believe the same way I do. I was very hesitant to write this but God continued to place it on my heart,and so here I am. Allow me to begin by saying: I love murders, I love people who commit adultery, I love burglars, I love people who are homosexual, I love people who lie, I love rapist, and etc. Whoah. Not what you were suspecting I suppose? Why? How could I love people who do such horrible things? They should be thrown into the pit of hell right? Excuse me. Jesus loved those people. And He teaches me everyday to love people like that. For those who pick and chose what to agree with in the Bible and need the reminder: EVERY sin in the Bible is the same in the eyes of God. Who are you and I  to condemn someone because of their sin? As Jesus told the scribes and Pharisees who wanted to stone the woman for committed adultery, "...Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw the first stone.." John 8:7 (ESV).  Do I love their actions? No. Why do I love those people? Because God didn't just pick and choose people to love. He loves everyone. Paul was an apostle in the Bible, but before he was an apostle he was known as "Saul". Saul killed many many people, but God still used him. God can use anyone. Sin is something that can be overcome by Christ, and only through Him alone. How I'm wired, I like to see past what people do. I like to figure out why they are the way they are, and why they do the things they do. I am NOT saying I agree with their actions, and I am NOT saying that is okay for you to go out and do those things because God will forgive you later. Life is too short to spend life living in sin. "What shall we say then? Are we to continue to sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin live in it?" Romans 6:1 (ESV) My whole purpose in writing this was covering the fact that how can we,who also sin everyday, determine someone else's fate? If we profess to be Christians, who are supposed to be filled with Christ's love, how can we just go up to people and tell someone that they're going to hell? or instead of trying to understand people, we just point out all the wrongs people do? Why do we tear down instead of lift up? Why do we just instantly judge instead of get to know people? Where's the love in that? I'm not saying to sugar coat. Who would want to follow Jesus,if that's what they see Jesus as? That's not Jesus. You wonder why non-Christians only see the things they don't like in the Bible, but that's the very same thing people do to people who aren't Christians. It's one thing to hold people accountable, but you can't expect someone who doesn't have Jesus in their heart to act like they do. I'm not justifying their actions,nor am I saying that's okay to 'just let it slide.' If we just simply show love instead of hate,you'll get a lot further with people. "Be imitators of God, the
refore, as dearly loved children and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." Ephesians 5:1 (ESV) You never truly know the heart of people. On the day the we meet God, God sees us who accepted Jesus in our hearts. He doesn't see the sin that we committed He sees the blood of Jesus who made us white as snow.